Fix You
by MoeMoiMoe
Summary: You are beyond dumbfounded; your lips hanging open in disbelief. How much, you wonder. Just how much does she love this boy?


You stare at her, and you realize

your daughter is beautiful.

She is spring, and she blooms and stands out and smells like the best of flowers and her cheeks are tinted with roses, her hair as pink as the Sakura Blossoms on your back yard, and her body as graceful as the dandelions dancing in the wind. Your little Sakura, you notice, is all grown up now – ready to take on the world.

But you can't help but wonder if she could take on the events that will happen later.

You can't really comprehend how this fragile, fragile little girl managed to even stand up on her feet, especially after the wretched sobs and broken hearts and shattered hopes – she is not like this before.

_"Daddy I'm home!" She runs to you and kisses your worries away, and all your previous problems of managing your business' finances and 'sir we are short of a hundred inventories' come scampering out of your mind. You kiss her cheeks and for a moment you notice that after last month's heart-falling incident of 'daddy please take me home' and 'daddy they're hurting me', that her eyes are back to the shiny little pieces of forever that you always see in her._

_ "Ino-chan defended me today." She said through smiling cheeks. "She's my best friend now, daddy, she's so kind and strong and –"_

_ You don't even care about your business anymore._

She stands on the porch, and she is facing you, and she is wearing this white, white gown and she is the sun and she shines; with her heart on her sleeves and you remember that it was supposed to be whiter than the silk she's wearing (and it has always been that way, you think to yourself, it has always been that way until now) but now it's tainted, but she still manages to smile, and it's white and it's perfect –

_You watch your little Sakura, now 8 years old, come up to you. "How's my little girl's day?" You smile and you kiss her cheeks, but she doesn't kiss you back. She is a statue in front of you; head down, unwavering, uncaring, indifferent. What's wrong, you ask. What's wrong._

_ "I have a boy that I like." She says through gritted teeth and closed fists._

_ You know that she's still too young for this but you want to make her happy so you told her that it is a good thing and you want to meet this boy what's in him that your little flower liked._

_ You ask her who he is._

_ "His name is Sasuke-kun."_

_ The Uchiha._

_ "And Ino –" _

_ She punches your shoulder in despair –_

_ "–Ino likes him too."_

_ And just like that, the world spun in the other direction._

But you notice how much she's changed she's something less and something more at the same time because she lost too much and gained too little and she looks like she's just learned pain a while ago because it's so fresh, fresh like the flowers you picked up this morning to deliver to your wife's grave and she's different because of that boy –

_Knock knock._

_ Someone knocks at your door._

_ "Who is it?" you wonder. You are not expecting visitors at five in the morning_

_ You open the door and behold, Uchiha Sasuke stands at your doorstep, asking for your daughter in a respectful manner. He says he's sorry for the disturbance and he's picking Sakura up for their daily training but you notice something else something so intricate about the way he regards you with respect and you realize_

_ He wants to gain your trust_

_ He wants you to approve of him not just as Sakura's teammate_

_ But as someone more._

_ You give him a small, painful chance and call your fourteen year old Sakura who's upstairs and as soon as you hear the word Sasuke she bolts down like lightning and she almost lost her footwork and she smiles so hard that her face almost cracks. She is the epitome of an angel._

_ And he smiles back ever so subtly and then Sakura kisses you goodbye_

_ And you think for a second that your daughter made the right choice_

_ Because he dates her and gives her flowers and eats often at your house and she's happy and your wife is crying because your 'daughter is all grown up, honey,' she says._

_ But then one night he leaves her and her teammate Naruto to pursue some sick, twisted, overrated revenge and you say to yourself that you should have not given that boy even a shard of chance and trust and words of take care of my daughter– _

_ And she doesn't talk after that. Words failed many breakfasts spoiled many nights thrashing many dreams crushed many whispers in the night many attempts shunned many curses streaming many hearts broken_

_ many days in fear._

_ And one day her now best friend Naruto gets sick and tired of waiting for her so he comes thrashing to your door step demanding 'Sakura-chan Sakura-chaaaaaaaaaaaaaan come out of that damn hell hole you- '_

_ And she emerges and rains tears on her best friend's chest._

_ You notice that Ino is there, there to offer her sympathy and a smile of we are still friends no matter what happens and Sakura stands again._

_ It's a shame to think that neither you nor your wife can fix your own daughter._

But she still stands ever so high, now a dignified ninja of Konoha who's trained under Tsunade's wing and now she has an iron fist and an iron will but her heart is still as soft as talc, easy to scratch, easy to break.

And her eyes are two earthquakes of sadness and tears, exposing her heart to be broken and tossed away.

Because in the next few hours, she will be watching her best friend get married –

–To the man she loves the most

And you wish you could have just taken her away a long time ago and you blame yourself for everything, but what can you do, you cannot even fix your own daughter, you–

_One day, he comes back, three years later._

_ And you thought your daughter has been fixed by those two blondes you owe everything to, but it wasn't when she welcomes him after he's finished his parole that you've never seen your daughter so fixed before and it's as if this boy has the power to make her and break her any way he wants and it angers you that he thinks he has some control over Sakura._

_ And you find her trying to spend more time with him and some nights she just comes back home frustrated, rambling on about how hard it is for her to talk to someone like him – _

_ "It's like talking to a damned brick wall, Dad! We're going nowhere with this. Naruto and I – we're trying so hard, so hard to – ugh. I'm going to bed. Goodnight, Dad." And you haven't even had the chance to speak._

_ For the next few days you hear from your daughter that Ino's helping them bring the "Old Sasuke" or the "OS" back as she says it (like a codename, so she can talk about it to you anytime without the market people knowing what the hell you're talking about) and at first she seems happy_

_ But then Ino's all Sasuke wants to see now._

_ Sakura tells you that "It hurts so much that he's only talking to me just to ask me where Ino is, what food she prefers to eat, what flowers she liked, and she's my best friend Dad, my best friend." _

_ One day she got fed up and confronted the boy. You were out for a late night walk and by chance you overhear them talking to each other on the swings in the community park._

_ You hear your daughter speak. "Do you like her?" She says in a calm voice, too calm you say, too calm for a raging temper like Sakura._

_ One word. "Yes."_

_ And you feel your daughter cry. For a moment you want to reach out and take her away but she's seventeen now she must've wanted to solve her own problems so you hold yourself back._

_ He must've been shocked because he says sorry to your daughter all over again and he hugs her tight and he says he still values her as a friend but its different with Ino and you're shocked because she hugs him back despite all the pain and it must've hurt like sitting on a cactus chair while getting your heart pierced but he's still the one who fixes her because she still smiles and it's still bright and you wonder if your daughter has lost her mind._

_ And then Sasuke comes at your doorstep, again, just like so many times before, saying sorry for what he's done and you and your daughter and want to smash his face, but you see Sakura peeking from the stairs and you see her smile and cry and she says it's okay so it's okay, you agree._

You snap out of your thoughts because she twirls herself to show you her beautiful, beautiful (shattered) being and she asks if she looks okay and you wonder, does she even need to ask when she is already the most beautiful girl in the world, but you know that she'll only shed tears when you say that, because she will only be filled with inferiority, saying that if she is, she would not be just Ino's maid of Honor and she would not be just Sasuke's teammate.

If she is the most beautiful girl in the world, she would be his lover.

_"Dad…" She is breaking. "Sasuke-kun… Sasuke-kun proposed to Ino today."_

_No._

And she would say that it would be easier to fall for Naruto instead, but he has Hinata now.

And you realize, that after this damned wedding, that your daughter would be alone.

Again.

_You are cleaning the house because of your wife's recent death, and in Sakura's room you see a brown notebook and you open a random page, only to see your daughter's messy, tear-stained writing. 'Naruto's with Hinata. I – I don't want to be alone.' A few words in her diary that you only had the chance to read now._

_ No. No. No._

Because of this you are losing control, you want to do something, to set things right, to say anything, anything at all, but instead, for the sake of this girl, you only choke out a "yes".

But you don't know what is happening to your body and words flew out so fast that you almost didn't realize it until you've finished that last word. "But you do not have to go if you don't want to, Sakura, you don't have to see him –"

_Another entry. 'I don't want to see them again. Ever. But Ino's my friend and Sasuke's my friend and God, why did I even volunteer too be Ino's maid of Honor?'_

And just like that, she shatters in front of you.

"Dad," she says through gritted teeth and teary eyes and heavy lips –

And she breaks and she falls, and you hold her like she's two when she really is twenty two, and you expect her to wail like she used to, but instead, she is a silent mystery as she clutches your coat. How much she's changed, and you question what made your daughter like this.

The boy, you realize.

The boy with raven hair and raven eyes and the palest skin, whom she talks about, day and night, even in her dreams, whom she and her yellow-haired whiskered friend Naruto, sees kindness in, even if you and the village only see him as a hollow monster and nothing more.

(And you still see him that way; because he broke your daughter's everything.)

"It's fine, dad." It's fine, she says, and she lets go. "It's not his fault I'm not enough and it's not his fault that he fell in love with someone else. He might be wrong to leave me hanging but Dad, he's so carefree you should have seen his face." A pause. A close of eyes, as if remembering the promises of happily ever afters. A look that you have never seen before.

"He's so painfully beautiful, dad, and he's happy. He's never smiled in years until now."

You don't know why but you get angry at her words and soon you're an emerging volcano in the ring of fire and then you explode. "How could you say that, Sakura, how could you, even after everything. He does not deserve you. He gives you hope, but he breaks it and breaks it again and again until you're beyond breaking. And I helped you pick the pieces up, but now you're the one who's breaking yourself! He isn't worth your time, he–"

" –He's my lifeline, dad."

_Dec. 10_

_ Sasuke Uchiha. My lifeline._

You are beyond dumbfounded; your lips hanging open in disbelief. How much, you wonder. Just how much does she love this boy? Because if you can afford it, you will buy it and pay it and you'll get it and throw it out of her reach and – God.

How expensive could love be?

But then she's still smiling and you immediately know that she's not asking for a price, instead, she's willingly giving it away, not to just anyone but to that boy and only to that boy. And you are the worst father in the world because you let her like this. You are rotten because you never taught her to leave a part of her heart to herself so that she wouldn't die. You want to teach her if you could, but you know you can never hope to do it, because when you loved your wife you gave your heart as a present and when she died, you died too.

She notices you are not speaking for a long time so she sighs a big breath and clears the rain in her eyes and says 11 words that make you wish you were the one who made her stronger.

"He saved me from weakness. I am strong because of him."

_ Dec. 12_

_ Sasuke saved me in way. When I realized that Mom's dead I didn't know what to do but he understands me ad he says he's there for me even if being there is not enough, I am complete because of him._

And you question her statement because even a 52 year old man as wise as you cannot even begin to understand the depth of this – whatever this is. But you don't say it out loud.

But she seems to know you the best because she answers your unspoken question. "Had it not for Sasuke breaking my heart, I would have been so weak when mom died that I would have gone with her when I saw her get buried six feet under.

"He showed me what is pain and he showed me that it reminds you that you care and the more painful it is, the more you realize how human you are. That more your heart breaks, the more you know how capable of loving you are.

"Love is wonderful, dad. And I've learned it, known it, and felt it myself. I just have you endure the pain that comes with it. And I hope…"

She stops. Pauses to look at the sky. Looks at you with emerald eyes and says 11 words again, but this time, made you feel like everything can be alright. That you can fix what's broken, because the pieces are still here in the porch, taking the form of your daughter.

"…I hope you can be there to hold me through it."

And you nod, and you trust her and believe in her, because she is your daughter, and you fulfill her hopes as you go to the church with her and on the aisle you hug her and kiss her cheeks and you say do your best, although you say it more to yourself than to her.

She smiles and she says that she will, she really, really will.

You are so proud of her.

And it hurts, but you have to endure it

because you are her father

and you'll do everything

to fix her.


End file.
